): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize