i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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