drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
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