Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
