He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
