We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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