how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
