just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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