GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
