Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
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