my room smells like sperm. sweet.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
