I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
