sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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