He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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