He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You had me at "let me see your balls"
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
