Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Randomize
