i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Randomize
