so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
two words: eviction party
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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