There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize