Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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