We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Shame is for Republicans.
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