if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Randomize
