Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I'm always down for nudity.
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