susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
