you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
