It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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