we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize