I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
