Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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