pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize