your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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