we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
