You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
How does one acquire holy water?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
