You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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