Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
