Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
