sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
