Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
