i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
