On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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