Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
high people should be assigned attendants
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Randomize