Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
