You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
