I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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