guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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