spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
