she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
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