So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
