Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
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