Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
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