But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
