She just used a chaser for red wine.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
